The Bourne Ridicule

A storyboard idea for a new Jason Bourne film, to be released as soon as you can get a cameraman ready, can you do that for me? Ta.

Well I thought I'd add a twist to the usual format of this series, and actually feature a plot. The plot, though highly developed and complex in comparison to the normal plots in these films, goes like this: Jason Bourne buys a cat. This cat tries to kill him, because the US government chipped him, in order to prove that the whole US government isn't eluded by one man who can't remember anything. Bourne kills the cat.

Next, he bumps into a seemingly nice man by the name of Roger, who is actually sent (and chipped) by the US government with the same intention as the cat. Bourne fights him in handcuffs and ensnared at the ankle region by a barbed wire rabbit trap, and ends up killing him with his teeth.

Then, he gets in a car and shouts at a passing car, something like "Hey you, punk ass bitch". The driver of this car takes the hump and chases Bourne, having been primed (and chipped) by the US government to kill Bourne at whatever costs. Bourne manages to kill him, his wife, 4 children and their pet lizard with one perfectly timed crash into a canister of gas.

Bourne is injured by this, but he still manages to muster enough strength to fight off and indeed kill 63 American agents who are after him, and give the kiss of life to the wife of the car driver, with whom he starts a whirlwind romance for the last 10 minutes of the film.

I would like to shoot this in the French style of Merde and show it to people for free so they don't waste their money on total and absolute toss.