Monday 23 March 2009

Feral Animals - Terrible Entities

As I was walking among the trees and leaves of the woods a squirrel brought to me the incredible thought that testing fate brings its own rewards in the long run. That he himself had successfully tested fate and had got a lovely nut with which to engage in the curiosity of burying a prize long sought. He had tested fate and won.

BUT YOU CANNOT TEST FATE, YOU MUST NOT TEST FATE

Sunday 1 March 2009

As our Saviour taught us, so we pray

Borja was a horse, and unlike other horses, he was aware of the fact. This didn't mean he didn't like donkeys, or oxen, or even the baby Jesus, he played with them all in the accepted manner. But he was a horse, and there ain't nuttin gon' change him! Except a far away party with a spanner.

He read his invite and set off. On the way he saw the March Hare from Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, and asked him for the time. Unfortunately the March Hare is quite old now and thought he'd been asked for a piece of pine, and thus sent him in the direction of a forest. The forest in question was just outside of Ormskirk in Chester.

In went Borja, and saw the spanner sat on an over sized mushroom.

"You tool," said Borja.

"You mule," said the spanner

"I'm not a mule," replied Borja

"Oh," said the spanner.

Oh indeed. The spanner was lost but couldn't ask Borja for help, as spanners lack the phonetic sound P, so if he asked for it, he'd only get hell, which wasn't really any good to him, being a spanner.

So Borja cantered off in the direction of the spanner's party, without the spanner. Upon arrival it became clear that Borja should have brought a bottle, and he got very concerned. So he spoke to a Priest who was nearby, and he became a Catholic instead of a Horse.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of our death. Amen.